Craziest Sh*t You've Seen Drivers Do

The other thread by Josh got me started thinking about all the wacky ..... I've seen drivers doing while behind the wheel. Curious to hear stories of what you guys have seen outside the usual applying make-up and eating Big Macs.

I'll start:
Once saw a guy with a full hardcover book open on the steering wheel, left hand holding the book open and reading it while the right hand was typing on a laptop propped on top of his dash. This was on the Bay Bridge at rush hour heading into San Francisco.

Again, during the morning rush hour, I also once saw a portly lady with a full dinner plate balanced on top of the steering wheel. When I rode up alongside her I was surprised (and impressed) to see that she had 3 pancakes, potatoes, toast, and several sausages rolling around the plate. She was eating a full pancake breakfast with a fork and knife while steering with her knee. She rarely ever lifted her head to look at the road; I was waving at her but she didn't even notice. This went on for a few minutes until she finally looked over and I motioned to my mouth to ask, "Can I have a bite?" She looked down at her plate again and went back to stuffing her face.

I've also seen attractive women putting on a show now and then, but there won't be any complaining about that.

Coming back from a very long trip up the east coast to Quebec City on my wing, coming thru Charlotte in the morning at rush hour, at probably 70 mph, guy in front of me was brushing his teeth, turning his head out the window to spit!

Another one, woman doing her nails, had hands on top of the steering wheel and was buffing the nails on one hand!

Nothing surprises me anymore on what people do while driving. It's funny but you seem to notice so much more of this while riding.

on a bike you notice all this crazy stuff. the reason i sold my zx10r in 2010 was because i got spooked by seeing 3 different cars doing things that when i got to work i said i got to get rid of this bike or im going to get killed.

driver 1 on my right had the newspaper opened across the steering wheel reading it in moving traffic
driver 2 in front of me younger lady putting on makeup while driving i see that all the time.
driver 3 in front but i was passing him to get away from drivers 1 and 2 young guy texting.
i got to work put my bike on craigs list.

not that I do this but ive "heard" of guys having jacks or marbles or even change in there pockets to wake these a hole drivers up.

I have seen a lot of ........ things over the years but today topped them all. I crossed the Gandy bridge heading into St. Petersburg, light traffic and very nice outside so I just enjoyed the ride. All of a sudden the car in front of me jams on its brakes, so I clamp the Brembos really good in order to avoid collision. Come to find out there was a white Benz going about 25mphs in a fast lane, I was a little heated so I flipped the driver off as I rode past him, only to find that guy on my bumper about a half mile down the road. I thought "Great. I got a ...... nozzle following me." Sure enough, he did follow me. He was on my rear tire the whole way until the expressway became a 3 way then he got beside me. I didn't pay attention to him so he started waving his arms out the window, flipping me off and screaming something. I watched that ..... go through his motions for a little bit and gave him "stroke the shaft" motion. Well that prompted him to swerve to hit me, I clamped the brembos again. He appeared to be a young middle eastern kid and was getting more and more unpredictable as the time went on, he kept swerving and yelling things at me. It was time to fight (probably in literal sense) or flight, I got off the road and starting making my way to a local Highway Patrol station but he didn't follow. Some people's kids.

Castor, that type of BS happens all too often unfortunately. Again, a lot of it during commute times as people are irritable and in a rush to get for work or home. The good news is that it ended without serious incident to yourself.

Do we really need to go here?? My legs are twitching just thinking about all of the dumb ..... I've seen driving.

Prior to my Duc days, I had lived in NYC for 13 years with mainly choppers as my scoots at that time and I thought I'd seen it all...guys getting head while driving (probably from a tranny as well), home boys with their driver's seats reclined fully horizontal to be in the G man avoid the bullets position, a dude literally biting his toe nails...(yoga pro?), the usual fleet of taxi driver immigrants eating falafels with both hands while ripping up and down the avenues...one 200 pound plus woman riding her sportster with black electrical tape across her nipples and no other shirt on (.... on a bike?) and numerous other flotsam and jetsam

Recently, the best was a guy with an iPad mounted to his drivers side windshield like a GPS and surfing the net while he was driving, tapping the touch screen and such while cruising at 50+...

Darwin would roll over in his grave fast enough to spontaneously combust if he'd seen what goes on around here while driving.

Best advice, put 'em behind you as fast as possible. Offense is the best defense.
(don't get me started on my taxi vigilante exploits! Someone had to teach them the rules of the road and how to respect motorcycle riders). NYC taxi drivers are safer without me there anymore.

Was in my truck driving the kids to school when a 90ish Civic passed me into oncoming traffic, swerved across my front to pass the next car on the gravel shoulder all this on the phone

RSR racer said:

(don't get me started on my taxi vigilante exploits! Someone had to teach them the rules of the road and how to respect motorcycle riders). NYC taxi drivers are safer without me there anymore.

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Well don't leave us hanging....

TricoloreSF said:

Well don't leave us hanging....

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Well....let's say I know someone who knew a guy who heard about a dude who almost got ran over by a cabby and after he took care of that one in the most efficient of manners (he wouldn't be driving a cab for a while I was told) there was a period of time where many a law breaking cab driver might have suddenly had his windshield smashed with a cleverly hidden hammer; or perhaps, as the legend goes, they would be followed to the next long red light and possibly even been removed from said cab and trampled underfoot.

Horrible behavior and an unbelievable urban legend, I am sure.

For a laugh and to lighten things up, you have to watch this Christina Applegate / motorbikie clip from the movie "The Sweetest Thing"

Full car scene from The Sweetest Thing 2002 - YouTube

99DUC said:

For a laugh and to lighten things up, you have to watch this Christina Applegate / motorbikie clip from the movie "The Sweetest Thing"

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Ohhoho, good times my friend..

Love both of those clips!! But the dog kick had me pissing the first time I saw that flick!

Police need to allow motorcyclist to be more aggressive for all the reasons above.
We should be allowed to ride 5 to 10 mph faster than the flow of traffic at all times.

Laurentinium said:

Police need to allow motorcyclist to be more aggressive for all the reasons above.
We should be allowed to ride 5 to 10 mph faster than the flow of traffic at all times.

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You mean you don't anyways?