How I turned another "cheek" (my life in prison)

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Dec 30, 2012
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Ontario, Canada
Dear Gents

I write to you today in the capacity of offering you my personal story of how, I turned my life around. After I was incarcerated 5 years ago, I decided to turn my life around after I was mentored by my prison cell mate who goes by the nickname "arsehammer."

We had a very cordial beginning. After the guards threw me in the cell , I came face to face with arsehammer. He came up to me holding dress and ladies wig with makeup in one hand and my orange male prison jumpsuit in the other hand.

His very first words to me was, "Ok, you can be the 'mommy,' or you can be the 'daddy'"
With out hesitation, i responded, "I'll be the 'Daddy'"

Arse then proceeded to then put on the dress , put on the woman's wig and makeup, then walked over to me and said, "Ok now, get on your knees and suck mommy's kak .." He was such a romantic:eek:
 
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Arsehammer knew my prison term was going to end soon as his was unfortunately for life...
He asked me what I was interested in and i said, "astronomy." I think he wanted to give me an education so I could take care of myself when I got out. How thoughtful:eek:

He said. ok I'll teach you about Asstronomy...

We spoke about the planets, especially blackholes.
We unfortunately got into a bit of an argument over the planet Uranus, as I insisted that the new scientific data shows that it is in fact not a Planet.. He thought it still was ...
Unfortunately, when Arse looses his temper, there is no reasoning with him. He knew he was the strongest inmate in the prison and had "thoughts grandeur."
He said " if I was a part of the universe, I would destroy anything, planets stars, gravity, dark matter"


He then said "To start, there will be only 7 planets left after I've destroyed Uranus"

What a romantic:eek:
 
Umm, and how exactly did that make you a better person or motorcyclist?
 
Umm, and how exactly did that make you a better person or motorcyclist?
\

For starters, I know now not to trust all the info one offers...
As for becoming a better "motocyclist," my arse hurts from the "experiences", so now I get my cheek off the seat more and makes turn ins easier..
..
 

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